May 12, 2014

Motherhood: Some of my Thoughts

I thought I was going to get through this Mother's Day without getting emotional. 
Who was I kidding?  I watched this sweet video and the tears started flowing.
 Then I was asked  to share a few words at church about motherhood/ 
my mom/ what motherhood means to me, and the tears really started coming.
I was so touched by the feeling of gratitude I have for the mothers in my life. 
I was also so overwhelmed with emotions of being a mom myself.

I sat and stared at my journal page as I wanted to write all my feelings and I literally couldn't put them into words. I was stumped. Usually writing is my thing. My pen hits the paper and just flows, this was so different. I just had to sit and soak up these feelings.

To sum it up, I realized even more than ever how deeply I love my own Mama, how much she means to me and the never ending selflessness that she has always employed. I realized again just how much I look up to her and love to be with her. There's no doubt in my mind that there could be a better mother for me. She's my best friend. She just gets me. More than anyone else, if I need a listening ear, she's there to listen. If I need someone to complain to, to share thoughts with, or when I simply can't decide on which color of shoe to wear with an outfit, she's there. My believer, my cheerleader, my friend, my mother.

I was also overwhelmed by the love and gratitude I felt for my Grandmothers and their example of motherhood. They both have had such influences on my life. I am so lucky to have my Grandma Mary still. She's one fun lady, I tell you! She never ceases to amaze me. She's always shown me how to be strong, and stand up for what's right. She never forgets to call or send cards for every occasion, making me feel so special. I love to talk to her and listen to her stories, it makes my day!  She's persistent, she's positive and she's just wonderful. She's my Grandma.

Being a mother means everything to me. I have wanted to be a mommy since I can remember. I dreamed about it my whole life. It sure does surpass any hopes and dreams I ever had. I have never experienced anything so hard, trying, beautiful, exhausting, rewarding, and amazing in my life. There is nothing that could have prepared me for motherhood. Being a mom Rosie (and baby girl on the way) is something I thank my Heavenly Father for every day. The love I have for my little Rose is something I never knew possible. It's so deep and so strong, nothing could ever break it. All the worry, fear, sleepless nights, messes, and meltdowns are worth it. The wonderful moments of motherhood far outweigh any hard aspect. I am forever ever ever changed for the better. Motherhood is a blessing and I pray every day that I can be a better mom the next.

       Mother's Day pedicure for me... quality paint job!      Delivering flowers in the morning. I will never forget the sound of  
                                                                                                  that sweet little voice saying "Happy Mother's Day Mommy"

I am grateful to be blessed with many amazing women in my life. I have an incredible mother in law. She is so sensitive and caring, truly one of a kind! I have so many examples to look up to in the motherhood realm; Aunts, Sister in laws, and dear friends all exemplifying motherhood in their own way. Although I will never be able to fully describe my feelings regarding motherhood, this is a little slice of what I felt this Mothers Day.
..and....... here I thought I couldn't turn my thoughts into writing?